FREEDOM

India
16 May 2025
thoughts and wishes for my dear Romania

my dear friends from back home, from dulce românie,
please all vote on sunday and please do wholeheartedly,
try to keep your minds vast to encompass views
of all of us romanians spread around everywhere and
a n d of the rest of humans sharing this planet with us as well,
so we can all still have some hope,
please think big, take some distance
and look at the whole map of entanglements,
all this interconnectedness between all of us,
outside media and bubbles we’re stuck in,
think of children, grandchildren and many future generations,
where will they live, in what kind of world we’re making for them,
think of freedom, peace, wellbeing of all friends and neighbours,
think of our planet and the dangers of the hottest days on earth,
please please vote in such way that your vote
will contribute to world peace, not war,
a world where everyone feels safe to be who they are
everyone of all genders all g e n d e r s, all ages all a g e s,
all colors all c o l o r s, all tastes and dispositions,
vote in such way that no one will be afraid to walk any streets
anywhere a n y w h e r e anymore
vote for proper education and healthcare for
everyone e v e r y o n e with no exceptions,
vote for rights all r i g h t s and real respect
r e s p e c t and care for everyone,
don’t let be space for wars, both inner and outer wars,
don’t let be space for living life in fear and tears,
please vote with a clear, lucid, wise and loving mind
and i hope we meet again one day soon,
in a free and sweet country 

ZOOMING IN

India
May 2025

one life long obsession that i have
is this greatly complicated admin collection elaboration
regarding organising items in suitable places:
arranging pictures in folders in cloud and good old hard drives, in projects and series and in sets on website, study notes and various texts in documents, daily thoughts in notes and pages, instructions and life advices in notebooks, true love letters in envelopes,
bookmarks in safari and chrome profiles, quotes and highlights from ebooks, daily death reminders, playlists and many various long lists 
this is some sort of collecting and archiving never-ending project which brings me some kind of ease and satisfaction when i am inside of it and sometimes more pain than pleasure when i am out of it
but it’s interesting for me to look at how my thoughts turn up and down and inside out trying to find out the best way to design these places, the routes of all these items, their directions, shapes, containers, goals and meanings
hoping that one day they’ll bring some benefit to someone
one day maybe me or someone else will learn something from them and become wiser and more blissful
maybe someone will get inspired and get an insight into something much greater by simply seeing some of these collections,
finding them and digging inside for whatever reason
looking at a picture or reading a letter and wishing to go deeper inside many layers in this world in their own minds, checking about seeing and being seen, illusion and appearance and what actually is there
and even now
this collection of letters - lines and dots with meaning, talking about this issue of life long collection project 
hopefully will help someone zoom in
in their own understandings and collections 
like i recently zoom in in all my pictures
of the sun and the moon on all skies in all places
zoom in reality, existence, labels and concepts, 
in an attempt to go directly to the most basic and raw file, so i crop and trim to get to the final pixel, try to understand what’s accurate reality, so one day i’ll eventually get rid of all collections, go beyond elaborations 

ABOUT BORDERS

India
May 2025

often i recognise some form of conflict that comes up inside of me
sometimes weaker, some frustration, sometimes way more destructive,
and quickly it goes everywhere in every corner of my being and colors all my thoughts
it brings a black cloud inside myself and makes me ugly and unpleasant
and when i give it loud voice and touches others, it creates turbulence in them as well
it’s like a mini war inside my mind - thoughts fighting each other
and a mini war outside - shooting anger missiles to loving neighbours

wars are going on on many levels:
inside each being a small war
between decisions, desires, disappointments
inside communities, between communities
between countries, wars on borders

it’s always this question of borders or making borders
what is mine border what is yours
what comes from me border what comes from you
what i am responsible for, what’s your responsibility
it’s always this stubborn wish to draw precise edges
to build fences in between me and you
to create division, separate, take distance
it’s always this dual thing going on
good and bad and the war in between them
and it seems it has to be like this with everything
up and down, left and right, extremes
and from each side, the other one is the bad one
so it’s an endless war
but borders are also healthy
they teach us how to interact with each other
they make us aware of our qualities and flaws
and they teach us interdependence
how we need and influence each other

a few nights ago i dreamed about people during wars,
how they talk to each other but they cannot hear each other anymore
they say words, but no one knows the meaning of those words anymore
they write messages, but those who read don’t understand them
then slowly no one remembers anymore how to speak, write and read
no one remembers how to communicate anymore
the war simply erases the basic relationships between people
and instead builds these walls of isolation
everyone ends up in a bubble by themselves
alone, miserable, misunderstood,
longing for love and togetherness
longing for some basic goodness
that’s usually hidden inside ourselves
but gets more hidden or even crushed during these wars

i think borders are great conventionally
they help with keeping us original
genuine, with unique features,
borders help us to appreciate our and others’ qualities more,
to value and support each other,
borders bring us this awareness of diversity, this multitude of wonders in this world
they help us learning about ourselves and others
conventionally borders teach us how to take responsibility for ourselves
and show up in the world, really being who we are
they teach us how to take care of and love ourselves and the rest of the world,
when we really see the borders, then they teach us how to communicate with each other,
they teach us how to use language, words and feelings in order to communicate
they teach us how to love each other with all our differences
borders are meant to bring us together
borders are arms embracing others

and borders are so so great ultimately
because they show us that there are no actual borders
we don’t have any contour around us, no straight outline separating us from anything else
they help us figuring out how our own individual conventional borders actually merge with the rest of the world
our small poor images of ourselves dissolve and then there is a big vast space for everything to exist peacefully,
there is space for everything to exist in whatever way they exist
all thoughts, all bodies, all humans, all countries and nations
ultimately borders teach us that borders are not obstacles but openings to the rest of the world
borders teach us to take distance from the borders and look at the big picture

but who knows how to look at
and learn from
borders

Kathmandu, Nepal
2022

Dharamsala, India
October 2024

how does it look inside there inside your heart
in between ribs and feelings along appearances and imprints
there from where all thoughts arise and play
where all emotions dance and jump around
can you check
what do you fill your mind with
do you have space for all the earthlings
what about outer space aliens and other beings
what about ghosts and forgotten dear ones from other realms
do you serve candies made of joy
do you have waterfalls of love falling everywhere
fountains of bliss for everyone
do you wish to have a space like this inside
to contain the whole world in it
to hold all babies all lovers all mothers
all in pain all distressed all fighting all miserable all dying
to caress them and keep them warm and away from suffering
to feed them with delicacies and offering delicious drinks
fulfilling all needs and wishes on all levels
keeping everything gentle covered in loving wisdom

how are you really
where do you go what’s your direction
is it the vast crisp open Himalayas in the mornings
when you look far away and can’t stop being mesmerised
where it’s breathtaking in any direction and the mind so vast
you look and nothing finishes
the mind expands as well it never ends
is it the peaceful clear lake outside a big city in a previous life
when you flow freely in between sun glitters
in all points of water your naked body so light no body at all
is it the land of freedom from wars and destruction out of time
freedom from all suffering in all possible worlds
for all possible past present and future beings
it is a place abiding in total peace and joy
where is this place
can you take me there

or do you stay where you are
if you know that clouds will go away one day
and that the sun shines continuously from its side
if you know that the infinite sky is always behind
and allow yourself freely in this space
unobstructed boundless space
are you friends with the clouds the rain the dark nights
what about the fog or the ocean of afflictions
can you swim in there
go to the surface breath go back and continue the journey
are you friends with your mind with all your thoughts
do you understand yourself
why do you take the decisions you take
where do they come from
is it a virgin area or do you know it well
is that an island of wishing to be at ease
an island of avoiding misery in the crazy ocean
an island inner factory for happines
do you think everyone knows about their own islands
do they take care of the gardens in there
where they have rhododendron forests
and exquisite fields of flowers of all colors and fragrances

do you think sometimes of what you think
if you think the way you want to think
if your mind is elastic flexible pliant
the mind the heart the same
do you ever think of opening the heart
when you open the curtains on a sunny morning in the winter
and the light comes in and the brightness smashes you
when you open the windows and the freshness smashes you
and the flowers in the vase wake up

do you think sometimes of others
in the most profound ways
do you wish for them to get to truly love themselves and the world
and to be immeasurably loved by all others
do you think they know their directions
do you think anyone knows

do you ever think of the sky or everything around
and think that’s all inside and not outside
do you connect the dots
the stars in the sky with the atoms in your body
do you know there are millions of more atoms inside the body than stars outside on the sky
how many millions of thoughts inside the mind
such fascination in both directions deep inside the mind deep outside far in the sky
do you ever walk this planet’s roads
and know about the huge brilliant universe inside
and know that’s you
do you see it in your friends and others
do you see each of them a cosmos a huge brilliant universe
if you would then you would never attack anyone
never bomb and abandon anyone

do you walk this planet’s roads and try to see yourself from the space
do you see nothing walking nowhere
and the planet a tiny blue ball with many lights and galaxies around
do you then think of how small we are
and let it overwhelm you
and wish to turn your mind around
to cherish any minute

do you turn inside out
does anything turn outside in

do you think of time how it goes in many directions
and that there is a lot of it without you or me
some time has our ashes lasting forever
but what’s forever
some time has us in sky burial in Himalayas
some has only dreams of us
some of it has only old blurry memories of us
in the minds of a few people
for only a few years after we’ve left
- that’s nothing in an eon

do you ever slow down and look at your life in one instant
one frame one blink
look at the moon and think
oh how i wish i make it meaningful
and not have regrets when i finish here
do you ever think to make a promise to yourself
to bring your mind back home
where the heart is
to never neglect to protect your mind
to invite all beings as your guests
and never harm anyone
can you let the promise pervade your body
from the crown of your head to the tip of the toes
then walk the roads with the promise
walk the roads with the universe inside
and think
auspicious mind
everything auspicious
suspicious mind
everything suspicious