journal set — iubinescu

EONS IN AN INSTANT AND INSIDE OUT

Dharamsala, India
End of October 2024

how does it look inside there inside your heart
in between ribs and feelings along appearances and imprints
there from where all thoughts arise and play
where all emotions dance and jump around
can you check
what do you fill your mind with
do you have space for all the earthlings
what about outer space aliens and other beings
what about ghosts and forgotten dear ones from other realms
do you serve candies made of joy
do you have waterfalls of love falling everywhere
fountains of bliss for everyone
do you wish to have a space like this inside
to contain the whole world in it
to hold all babies all lovers all mothers
all in pain all distressed all fighting all miserable all dying
to caress them and keep them warm and away from suffering
to feed them with delicacies and offering delicious drinks
fulfilling all needs and wishes on all levels
keeping everything gentle covered in loving wisdom

how are you really
where do you go what’s your direction
is it the vast crisp open Himalayas in the mornings
when you look far away and can’t stop being mesmerised
where it’s breathtaking in any direction and the mind so vast
you look and nothing finishes
the mind expands as well it never ends
is it the peaceful clear lake outside a big city in a previous life
when you flow freely in between sun glitters
in all points of water your naked body so light no body at all
is it the land of freedom from wars and destruction out of time
freedom from all suffering in all possible worlds
for all possible past present and future beings
it is a place abiding in total peace and joy
where is this place
can you take me there

or do you stay where you are
if you know that clouds will go away one day
and that the sun shines continuously from its side
if you know that the infinite sky is always behind
and allow yourself freely in this space
unobstructed boundless space
are you friends with the clouds the rain the dark nights
what about the fog or the ocean of afflictions
can you swim in there
go to the surface breath go back and continue the journey
are you friends with your mind with all your thoughts
do you understand yourself
why do you take the decisions you take
where do they come from
is it a virgin area or do you know it well
is that an island of wishing to be at ease
an island of avoiding misery in the crazy ocean
an island inner factory for happines
do you think everyone knows about their own islands
do they take care of the gardens in there
where they have rhododendron forests
and exquisite fields of flowers of all colors and fragrances

do you think sometimes of what you think
if you think the way you want to think
if your mind is elastic flexible pliant
the mind the heart the same
do you ever think of opening the heart
when you open the curtains on a sunny morning in the winter
and the light comes in and the brightness smashes you
when you open the windows and the freshness smashes you
and the flowers in the vase wake up

do you think sometimes of others
in the most profound ways
do you wish for them to get to truly love themselves and the world
and to be immeasurably loved by all others
do you think they know their directions
do you think anyone knows

do you ever think of the sky or everything around
and think that’s all inside and not outside
do you connect the dots
the stars in the sky with the atoms in your body
do you know there are millions of more atoms inside the body than stars outside on the sky
how many millions of thoughts inside the mind
such fascination in both directions deep inside the mind deep outside far in the sky
do you ever walk this planet’s roads
and know about the huge brilliant universe inside
and know that’s you
do you see it in your friends and others
do you see each of them a cosmos a huge brilliant universe
if you would then you would never attack anyone
never bomb and abandon anyone

do you walk this planet’s roads and try to see yourself from the space
do you see nothing walking nowhere
and the planet a tiny blue ball with many lights and galaxies around
do you then think of how small we are
and let it overwhelm you
and wish to turn your mind around
to cherish any minute

do you turn inside out
does anything turn outside in

do you think of time how it goes in many directions
and that there is a lot of it without you or me
some time has our ashes lasting forever
but what’s forever
some time has us in sky burial in Himalayas
some has only dreams of us
some of it has only old blurry memories of us
in the minds of a few people
for only a few years after we’ve left
- that’s nothing in an eon

do you ever slow down and look at your life in one instant
one frame one blink
look at the moon and think
oh how i wish i make it meaningful
and not have regrets when i finish here
do you ever think to make a promise to yourself
to bring your mind back home
where the heart is
to never neglect to protect your mind
to invite all beings as your guests
and never harm anyone
can you let the promise pervade your body
from the crown of your head to the tip of the toes
then walk the roads with the promise
walk the roads with the universe inside
and think
auspicious mind
everything auspicious
suspicious mind
everything suspicious

RAYA IUBINESCU

RAYA IUBINESCU